Another Year~ Childhood Memories

May is upon us already.. and with it another year for me draws to its maypole_thumbcompletion.. As I mark another year to my calendar today. The Month of May begins for me with a Celebration of memories.. May is the time when blossoms bloom, and bluebells flower.

I look back within my mind at my childhood, my youth and now my autumn years.. As I see the many changes which unfolds within a life time..I reflect today the many colours which have contributed to my life.. And like the Maypole ribbons each one woven in their own unique colours as they streak through my mind.. Some clear, while others have blown away in the passing of time.

May brings back memories of many birthdays and as I sit and pen this post of memories, I see myself aged 7 dancing the May-Pole in my Village of Stoney Middleton with one of the rare new dresses I would have to wear.. As my Aunt would buy us all a new Easter outfits just once a year. ( as my parents were not so well off ), which often would be miles too big.But I remember well this day in May as I danced with glee, for my dress in poker-dots of blue velvet on white net, like a ballerinas gown was my pride and joy.. I was a princess that day ~I remember lining up in the church vestry waiting to skip out onto the Nook in a line on cue to music, as we took our positions and picked up our ribbons from the boys who stood in the middle keeping the pole sturdy. ~ It mattered not that day that my dance partner a boy, who when we danced over and under went the wrong way and we all got entangled as we skipped our way around the central circle Pole. And our teacher came to our aid as we untangled ourselves..

We would as children gather our mothers bluebells from the valley and later it would be Lilies of the Valley.I can still smell their perfume as I see the images within my minds eye as we would tie them into the small circles of Posies .

My brother would get into trouble for climbing trees, to look into birds nests. But then we all climbed and swung on trees making rope ladders and swings and dens in the wood. We skipped over the meadows picking the many large Moon Penny Daisies and Buttercups and jumped the local brook. I remember being chased off private land near our local small private Middleton Hall by their Gardener..The same Hall that held garden parties for the village on Wakes week, when the Wells were Dressed with the Wells Dressings , with WI stalls of home made cakes and jams. The Tombola stall, and the Lucky Dip..And roll a penny.. Tug of War completions in fancy dress.. Morris Dancing’s, And how All the villages pulled together..

And we would help the local Farmer at harvest time with haymaking, taking two or three of us at a time to drag the square bales of hay into piles for the tractor to collect..

Dad would catch wild rabbits and we would get Rabbit stew on the menu quite regular.. Meat was expensive but we had Pheasants and partridges too, Living near to Chatsworth House my Dad knew someone who when they had their game shoots, the birds which were too badly shot damaged would go cheap.. I remember well sat around the table and Dad saying ‘chew well’, as we all spat out the led shot pellets as they clanked on our plates..

I often find some of those early memories are clearer in my mind than that which I did yesterday…..

May is a special month of the Year.. And just wanted to share a few childhood Memories .. As I Look back today.

Me-Age-5_thumb19

Sue Dreamwalker

The Moment.

How long could she shut out the World? To open her eyes would allow the harsh light of day to blind her vision. A vision she no longer wished to see. She had witnessed cruelty beyond measure of Man’s inhumanity to man.

If she kept her eyes closed she could shut the world out. She could stop the constant chatter; the inaudible rabble the world threw out, the constant noise of the ‘woe is me’, ‘the I have not’, ‘the I want’ and ‘it’s mine’

Within the darkness behind her closed eyelids she could create a perfect world. A world of love and healing, a world of unity and sharing, a world of giving and receiving. A selfless world of Peace.

She wished this throbbing in her temples would cease, in fact it was at such times as these she wished she could just vanish completely. But as soon as the thought appeared she vanquished it from her mind, she knew she still had to fulfil her destiny, complete her mission, she knew her ‘Time’ was not yet.

‘Time’ ….everything had its Season, a time to sow a time to reap, ………

Harvest Time, ….. Now there she could focus, she knew all about harvest time… (We plough the seeds and scatter the good seed on the land) arrgh she thought what seeds indeed did we sow. Again she was a child, running, carefree, laughing.. Oh to have that feeling back, to wake each day with that Joy and spring in her step. To view the world with untainted innocence.

She wished Time would open up its ticking hands just to hold her still. To stop her thoughts from racing off into the future or slipping into the past. She wished Time would hold her still within that ‘moment’.

She laughed out loud, the sound echoed within the tunnel of her thoughts like an alien train. She’d had many ‘moments’ and each of them had been a ‘Now moment’ but she had let them All slip away as she looked over her shoulder as the shadows of the past crept up. Or she chased them into her future wishing them to come.

The salty brine oozed from beneath her eyelids, but she still refused to open them. Where did all those ‘Now’ moments go? Lost, gathered up in vague recollections.

The Light squeezed a ray of silver under her lids as the salt stung at her eyes.. Her temples throbbed in unison with her heart, pounding now within the cage beneath her breasts. A cage she had placed herself in. The rays of light filtered through her lashes creating prisms of colours that darted in lines she counted them, One,…… two,…….. three………………….

She opened her eyes with a start, the Sun had come out from behind the clouds.. She was back within the ‘Now’.. and a smile once again touched her lips for she realised she could live within the Now Moment any time she wished.. For ALL Moments are Now moments..

She just needed to believe and Live and ‘breathe’.. Every Moment Now….

© Sue Dreamwalker – 2011 All rights reserved.

Home Coming.

 

She lay upon the bank of grass hands behind her head looking up at the sky. The clouds were fluffy like she remembered when a child as they drifted slowly in front of the pale blue sky.

A bird called out in the distance, she listened again to its call, she recognised it as the call of a Grouse way off to her left. A butterfly, small and brown flew by her as she turned to look at the meadow flowers, knowing them all like old friends.

The Hazelnut Tree was directly in her line of vision as she saw the clusters of nuts still pale not ripe to be picked. Her mind flew back to childhood when her father took her nutting, gathering nuts from the trees sweet and small, and how she’d spend time cracking their shells opening up their delightful centres to place them upon a small dish sprinkled with salt. The hours of patient harvesting, cracking, gone in a second of delicious sensations upon the taste-buds.

She tasted them again now in her mind as she thought of another hill many years later. The climbing of rocks as she scattered the ashes of memories laying to rest her father in his favourite Valley of walks

The breeze stirred her mind back to look at the clouds which now had become a little thicker in the sky blotting out the Sun for a while… She shuddered and lifted herself up as the tears of her lost childhood washed down her face.

A voice at her side spoke in soft gentle tones whispering within her mind, she listened intently as she looked at the Hazelnut Tree.. The Voice recounted a story of long ago of a journey of souls, a journey where they knew everything had purpose, and everything had reason. She heard the voice tell her of a vow made long, long ago.. She knew then, as she knew now, that her story was only just unfolding.

Held within the threads of her searching her journey started long ago upon a vessel in the ocean of life as she set sail upon her course to weave the creation of her present position. She was almost home. But first she knew a story needed to be told.. One so powerful it set her tingling… She looked up again to the Sky and saw two Hawks circling in the sky above her.. She smiled content.

She lay back upon the grass and put her hands behind her head once again, closed her eyes to remember where it first began…

She was  Almost Home………………….

Dreams

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Sue Dreamwalker

Sue Dreamwalker

Each of us, carries within us the capacity to change the world in small ways for better or worse. Everything we do and think affects the people in our lives, and their reactions in turn affect others As the effect of a seemingly insignificant word passes from person to person, its impact grows and can become a source of great joy, inspiration, anxiety, or pain. Your thoughts and actions are like stones dropped into still waters, causing ripples to spread and expand as they move outward.. I hope that I can send a few ripples out via the web of life, as we each of us weave the threads together... Welcome to my Sanctuary of Peace and Love... May we each spread our Lights around our World....Sue Dreamwalker

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