Vision Quest 8 Conclusion.~ Facing Fears

Background to the story so far. Muna was brought up from the age of two and half by her Full blooded Native American Indian Grandmother.  Aponi had taught Muna lots of the Ancient ways of living from the land along with many traditional ceremonies.

Muna had reoccurring nightmares all of her life, Now in her late teens she was following her Grandmother’s advice and had embarked upon a Vision Quest to see it she could find the reason for the Shadows that haunted her Dream time.

The full part of this Vision Quest can be read in separate parts HERE.

This is the final part of the Vision Quest Chapter in which Muna finds out more about her past. This will be longer in length than the previous parts.

 Facing Fears

Once again the old fear came back as the garden no longer felt welcoming. She shuddered again, as a blanket of thick mists enveloped her. Muna knew she had to find out what lay beyond the door. What was the shadow that haunted her dreams? Muna turned to the North Door to help her overcome the fears she held so deep within.

“ Help me Grandfather Sky, clear the mists before my eyes, show me the way Grandmother Earth, help me overcome all that is hidden, that makes me afraid.” Muna’s voice was calm but she couldn’t help but feel fearful for what the North door had hidden behind it.

As if in answer to her plea the mists parted before her and the door in the North Wall loomed into  her vision. Her eyes took in the old wooden door, she saw the many grains etched upon its surface along with the knots, and she saw the old nails which held the rusty hinges in place. She thought of the long forgotten tree which was cut down to create such a door as she stroked the wood feeling the knots. At the same time she felt the knot twist within the pit of her stomach as that old emotion of dread surfaced.

Source: Google Images

But Muna  shook  off this feeling  as she concentrated upon the knocker positioned in the centre of this old arched shaped doorway, and she was not surprised that the handle was formed from two twisted engravings of snakes entwined together.  For some reason Muna remembered something her Grandmother had told her about Quetzalcoatl  And the symbolism of snakes primal energy. She knew now was the time to shed another skin as she let go of that which restricted her as she allowed the life force to heal and guide her through the changes. Knowing the door would open up more questions, but  would also lead her to new discoveries of her inner being. 

Looking down now at the water in which she thought she had to wade through, the mists had lifted revealing stepping-stones opening a path towards the door.. Muna smiled knowing all things were possible if only one believed. She took a deep breath as she made her first step as she stepped across the stones walking towards the door.

As she looked where she put her feet, she saw the weed thick within the murky water, and was aware of something slithering its way across the water keeping pace with her as she saw the ripples just beneath the surface. She heard the occasional splash as if something either surfaced or dived, and her heart began to pound. Again her thoughts raced as her Grandmothers words once again came to mind.

“ Face Your Fear” she heard the echo of Aponi’s words as she got closer to the door.. ” You only fear what you do not know Muna. Fear is just a stranger whom you so not yet know. Once you become the observer you will see there is nothing to Fear but Fear itself.” Muna had long puzzled at this remark of her Grandmother’s.

So she squared her shoulders and took a deep breath and closed her eyes. She asked to become the ‘observer’. When she opened them she was there, she now saw the age of this old door, as the wood had splinted and dried. She reached out her hand and took hold of the door knocker and instinctively knocked twice. As if by magic the door swung open, as it did so more mists seemed to bellow out in front of her. Stepping through the mist, crossing the threshold of the doorway Muna waited hoping the mists would  recede, she saw a scene she half recognised, but wasn’t fully aware from where.

Before her a scene unravelled, she was in a small room with sparse furnishings with a wooden table in the centre, in the corner was a familiar rocking chair with a colourful crocheted shawl hung over its back, somewhere in the background Muna heard a child crying.

Muna’s attention was then taken to a young woman, cowering in the corner of the room who was crying. The woman had long raven black hair that was strewn across her face wet with tears. As the mists cleared further Muna saw there was also blood on the young woman’s face. A man’s voice shouted in rage

Muna found herself floating above the scene as the woman was pursued by a man. The man was screaming obscenities at her, yelling and screaming, he seemed to be possessed by the devil himself as his eyes bulged and his face was distorted in rage.  Sobbing the woman got up to run outside, she got half way across the yard as the man yelled as he ran after her, the woman turned running backwards at the same time before she stumbled and fell. She hit her head hard upon the ground, Her sobs instantly stopped as her body now motionless and lifeless lay upon the ground..

The man stopped in his tracks, as if waking up from a dream he looked down at his hands. Had he really hit his beautiful wife..   He looked up to the skies and now it was his turn to scream, as he let out such a wail of anguish as he yelled out the to the sky.. Words she knew he was speaking, and yet she couldn’t hear any of them. She only saw the woman lifeless on the floor, the child who cries she had heard now emerged from the doorway, she was only a young toddler but she ran to the fallen woman, tripping over as she fell beside the woman, crying “Mama, mama”

It was then that Muna understood, the toddler was herself, it was she crying ‘Mama’, and the fallen woman was her Mother. She looked now feeling the tears spill onto her cheeks, as she saw the man, her father.

Muna was seeing him now for the very first time.The toddler had fear in her eyes as the dark shadow of her father loomed over them both as he bent over the two of them he started to cry. Lifting his wife into his arms, asking for her forgiveness, as he didn’t mean it, he hadn’t meant it, as once again his temper and rage had flared taken over by the drink which consumed his soul. 

He was distraught and ran back into the cabin. Muna saw the toddler sitting at the side of her Mother pulling at her sleeve for her to wake up.  It was then a large Bang now echoed out into the air, not only sending a shudder through Muna, but she saw the toddler visibly jump, afraid of the noise, frightened and confused now no longer feeling her mother’s warmth, she watched as the toddler climbed onto her mother, hugging her as her blood still oozed out onto the ground from the back of her head. She saw the smoke now curl up around the edges of the cabin as it swept across the yard like a thick mist. The toddler lay curled in a ball sobbing on her Mother’s breast ………………..

Muna came too from her Vision, curled in the centre of the medicine wheel in a tight ball, the sky was now dusk as the Sun began to set the air had taken on a chill.. She sat up within her circle of stones feeling the tears upon her own cheeks.. She looked at the setting Sun her thoughts in a muddle for a second until she recalled she was on the mountain within her Vision Quest. Thanking Grandfather Sky and all her ancestors that had helped her to see her vision, Muna sat and thought upon all she had been shown.

It had  explained much more than Aponi had ever told her about the passing of her Mother and Father. Why had her Grandmother never told her the truth of how her parents had passed. All she had been told that her father was white and had struggled all his life with drink. As soon as Muna had been old enough to ask about her Mother she was always told it was in a tragic fire from which she had been rescued. When Muna had enquired how such a fire had started and wanted to learn more. Aponi had always dismissed her inquisitive questioning by saying..

“ When you are older Child, the Great Spirit will reveal All to you when the time is ripe, then your journeying will begin.”   Yet Muna had also heard the rumours from the village folk and had heard the whispers of turned heads looking her way of Murder and a fire, yet she had never dared ask if this was true fearing the worse of why she was orphaned .. But now she knew her Father had not murdered her Mother, but his rage had contributed to her tragic death.

Muna reached out for the precious locket and unwrapped it from the hand kerchief. She opened it and touched the lock of raven black hair. The locket had been her mother’s the only thing she had.

Muna then took the candle which had toppled over and gone out, she secured it upright by digging it into the earth, and relit it, sending a prayer to her Mother, and one for her Father asking that they both now rest in peace as she hoped now that her mind would be eased as at last she was able to recall those blurred visions of a toddler. 

So many Fears stem from the memories engraved within the growing pains of a child.. She saw now the reason she disliked loud noises and the shadows which always seemed so menacing. She also knew the truth of her deep-seated Fear.

She began to understand Aponi’s words of becoming the observer. Muna saw how her perception through being traumatized when her father’s shadow had blocked out the Sun when he had bent down over her Mother had created the fear, coupled with the loud bang.. She realised her father had killed himself then set their home on fire such was his anguish. 

She saw too how everyone must have thought her father had murdered her mother and presumed the truth. How easy it is she thought to judge, yet not be in full possession facts. She would obeserve more often in future rather than jump to conclusions she thought. 

She took another sip of her water, and was just going to stand up and make a fire, when she heard a voice.. She looked left and right of her, as she was uncertain as to where the voice had come from, it startled her to realise the voice was inside her head, But so clear did it speak..

“This is just the beginning of your Journey, Little One, You now have faced the fear of the past, now you have to face the fear of the future..”

Muna didn’t understand, but she soon would………………….

~~

This is the last of the series Vision Quest for a while    … I hope you enjoyed this lengthier last episode..

© Sue Dreamwalker 2010- 2016 All rights reserved.

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Vision Quest 7~ The Bees~ Collective.

To read episodes 1 to 6 visit HERE

 

Vision Quest 7. The Buzz of Bees

Muna turned to face another wall of the garden, here climbing the walls were the many clematis showing off their beautiful blooms along with climbing roses. Entwined amongst them all were bindweed and ivy, the ivy had grown so thick in parts the wall could no longer be seen. Here Muna’s attention was drawn to the Bee’s as she saw them collecting the pollen and inspecting each flower, each with heavy yellow sacks of pollen they had collected.

Image Source Here

She saw the bees fly off and watched as they all seemed to be heading in the same direction. Around in a circle they flew and she saw them land one by one flying underneath what appeared to be a flat stone. But upon looking closer Muna saw that it was a hive.

The Buzz of their wings now seemed to intensify as Muna seemed to travel now within the hive as she saw the cones of honey being created. She saw the Queen, the lava being tended and fed, Muna remembered all the things Aponi did with honey and how medicinal its properties are.

Honey is the only food on the planet that will not spoil. All seemed so perfect each cone exactly perfect in dimensions and size. How did the bees create such intricate perfection? The Buzzing seemed to overtake her senses again as she heard all the bees talking all at once, telling each other with their musical dance where the best pollen was located.

Muna smelt the fragrance of the roses as the perfume lifted her as she seemed to fly around the garden, she felt the softness of the Rose petals, she was showered by the pollen, She flew from flower to flower exploring their stamens feeling the joy of freedom. Muna felt the love from the flowers as they opened their hearts to accept her.

Muna now found herself standing once again viewing the scene in the middle of the garden… She saw the butterflies drinking the nectar, she saw the many bugs crawling among the vines, the green flies, the ladybugs and she saw the birds as they flew in and out of the ivy, she saw a small bird digging with her beak into the undergrowth turning over the leaves as she searched for food.. Nature was perfect she thought.

All things created for each to survive, ALL are connected.

 She thought of the work the Bees did, pollinating the flowers and crops, if it were not for that busy bee she thought, what would happen to the crops and flowers. What would happen to mankind? As if in answer to her unspoken question a Hawk swooped down from the sky out of nowhere and plucked the small bird from where she had just seen it gathering food. All she heard was its cries, and they were both gone, with only the flutter of a few feathers left on the ground. Her heart gave a lurch in sadness..

Muna bent to retrieve the feathers and held them within her palm, as a gust of wind blew sending them flying high over the wall … She shivered, as a tear dropped to her cheek. Muna also understood that Nature was also perfectly balanced.. All things created for each other to survive also meant that some died so that others may live.

Image result for Garden door in wall

Image source Google Images Here

As Muna’s eyes looked around the garden she saw the mists had now come back, creeping up once more around Muna, making the garden now seem unfriendly. She felt the chill in the air. She looked over her shoulder, and saw the Wooden Door in what would have been the North Facing Wall. The heavy wooden door looked forbidding. As another shiver ran down her spine.

 

This part of the garden seemed more neglected, the weeds had overtaken the boarders to the wall, and thick brambles grew along with poison ivy, wild garlic, and bulrushes. Here she saw there was a small pond, which was clogged with weeds and mud, but life still swam in its depths, as she saw the small fish dart this way and that.

A cloud seemed to pass over the Sun and it plunged the garden into shadow sending more cold shivers though her being…

This was the Door Muna feared the most, instinctively that she knew she would have to open up the door and walk through it, but to do so; she needed to wade through the water before it..

“ Only you can face your Fears Muna” Aponi’s voice echoed in Muna’s mind.

 “ For it is only you that give them life”..

 

More to follow in the not too distant future, as Muna confronts her fears and finds out what has haunted her Dream time for so long as she goes through the North facing door. 

Love and Blessings

Sue

Image Source Here

 

Vision Quest 6~ Reflections of Self

The first parts of this Story can be found HERE Wolf-Reflections-Within.png

 Muna turned to what was the South wall in the garden and saw many large mirrors embedded within it, twisted around them was variegated ivy in many shades of green.

The summer Sun reflecting light that dazzled the eye, illuminating her mind, showing her that all things have a cycle, She heard the birds again singing in the distance communicating with each other along with the tinkling of bells as she saw then that there were also many tiny mirrors which had been hung in amongst the trees that twisted and turned in the breeze, and yet here there was no breeze. These smaller mirrors faced back through the larger ones and the illusion of mirror within mirror where ever Muna looked down an endless wall of more mirrors until they disappeared into the distance..

The thought then came so clear, we are all fragments of the One mirror, all reflections of one another, we are within each other each seeing a different perspective going on and on.. One within one like a hologram.. All ONE contained with the smallest of pieces..

She saw the mists rise within the garden revealing many hidden treasures.. These were statues of birds, and animals, as she looked closer she saw many of these statues of Butterflies and Dragonflies and ornaments had been partially covered by the tall grasses and weeds which surround the edges of the garden.

The Animals were calved pieces of wood, each animal was set doing a task.. The Beaver was nibbling his way through a log, there were birds building nests and within a wooden carving was a spider weaving her web, and on another was a Turtle burying her eggs.

All things were striving to build a nest she thought, all in different ways all working so hard to achieve, and yet they all knew instinctively how to do so, no one showed them how, they just did it.

They all never gave up. If the Beaver’s Dam burst then they would build another, if a nest got destroyed in a storm the nesting pair would mate again and build another. The spider would build another web when hers got torn, and the Turtle she travelled thousands of miles to return to the same shore where she was born and yet no one had shown them how. 

Muna then knew what she was being shown. She should always trust her emotions, her instincts were built inside her too for a reason and she should never give up, but always follow them despite the obstacles that would be thrown in her path.

~~~

 

OK  Tomorrow One More part to come,  as  I am sure you have had more than enough of this story for now… Not much more before the end of Muna’s Vision Quest as she seeks answers to her fears. And it will not be long before I am back to moderate all your pending comments..

There is more to this story the Vision Quest’s Chapter, But I will post those after my return..

© Sue Dreamwalker 2010- 2016 All rights reserved.

This is part of a Scheduled post.. I will reply to comments upon my return..

Love and Blessings Sue

Vision Quest 5 Energy.

The Beginning of this Story in all its parts can be found HERE

Looking through her closed lids a light that started as a spec grew rapidly before her. She knew she had her eyes closed, and yet the light grew brighter. Muna continued to breathe in deeper and deeper, all the while asking for the sacred ones to protect and help her on her inner journey of discovery.

All around the birds were chirping their merry chatter to one another, and still the light was there growing brighter. Deeper again she breathed in as the birds now started to fade into the background overtaken by a rushing sound which sounded like the rippling of water over stones flowing very fast.

But as Muna sat, she knew that this was not a sound at all, but it was the silence within her own being. The light now started to diminish and gradually receded back to the pinprick that it had started out as. She felt herself being sucked backwards and a new rushing sound overtook the silence, it was almost a buzzing sound, like that of a bee in the distance she felt her heartbeat and the blood pumping through her veins.

The buzzing sound grew louder, Muna knew this sensation it was the sensation she sometimes got when drifting off to sleep. Allowing the familiar sensation to sweep over her she felt herself being pulled backwards as if she was being dragged out from her body through the top of her head. She swayed backwards as she sat, and now the buzzing sound entered her whole being, as she felt the vibration of its beat enter her body, she allowed herself to be swept along with it she saw the Light once again.

Muna was pulled towards this light as if it was a magnet, she had no control as she floated towards the tunnel of light which now shone brighter than ever.  It glowed with a multitude of colours all colliding with one another mixing yet more colours as they met. A kaleidoscope of Light fragments all fused together forming a column in which she was now pulled into.

She felt the energy, the radiance of love that was emitted and she knew she was safe. If Muna could describe her feelings as she travelled through this column of light was to liken it to being surrounded by the guardians who held her in their beam of tranquillity and loving embrace.

Floating through the mists she sensed  she faced East. She breathed deeper still just enjoying the sensation of floating, as the ground seemed no longer solid beneath her. As she breathed in it was as if she breathed in the Spring Air with all the fragrant flowers her mind all at once seemed to clear as she blended with the beauty which now opened up around her.

Now as her vision cleared and the mists parted, no longer was she within the circle on her mountain side, but she was in a high walled garden with climbing clematis of many shades of blues, pinks and whites clinging to the walls which encased the garden on all four sides apart from one wooden door on the North facing wall..

The door was practically hidden with ivy, vines, and brambles. There were many plants in tubs along with herbs, hanging baskets too in strange objects such as old kettles and pans hung from hooks on the wall and what appeared to be an old bathtubs full of flowers. She had seen this garden before, but now it was in full bloom, more mature in every way..

What a beautiful strange garden she thought, and yet all seemed perfect. It matted not in what vessel the flowers were contained, for the beauty of the flowers showed themselves in perfection in all of these various containers…’Never judge’ she heard her own inner self saying, “It matters not what appears on the outside it is what is contained within that gives it beauty’..

How right these words were she thought as she saw the beauty of the flowers as they shone through the rusting old pans and pots.. She then saw a man tending to the plants, ragged in appearance and yet here viewing him she saw surrounding him a halo of gold light which moved with him where ever he went in his garden..

Muna saw the love pour forth upon his tended flowers, as she witness how they responded with their blooms of colour. And she understood why it was that some had greener fingers than others. As she saw the energy exchange of love  between the man and his plants.

© Sue Dreamwalker 2010- 2016 All rights reserved.

to be continued:

Comments will be moderated upon my return.. I thank you all for your patience.. and to any new readers welcome to Dreamwalker’s Sanctuary

Image Source HERE

Love and Blessings

Sue

Vision Quest 4~ The Four Directions

You can follow the beginning  of the Vision Quest in small Parts which start  HERE

Muna enters her Medicine Wheel and speaks to the Four Directions as she requests help with her Vision Quest from her ancestors

 

The Four Directions Continued:

Muna spoke in a calm clear voice, as she entered her circle from the east setting her mind with her intention she stood within the middle of it.

“I welcome you Great Spirit, Earth Mother, and Powers of the Four Directions… I welcome my ancestors and all who love me..I ask that you grant me a vision, help me to shed all that I no longer need, Help me understand my true self, help me chase away the shadows”..

Muna then lit the candle which she had secured in the earth, it flickered in the breeze, she blew hard again upon the sage and made more smoke encircle around herself.

She closed her eyes for a few moments and breathed deep asking within her mind for the vision to commence as she stood within the cocoon of energy she had created for herself. Muna mentally asked the living Spirits in nature to come and bring their energy to help her in her Quest. Opening her eyes she faced the larger stone on the compass point of the East which was dedicated to Air, which signified spring, a gateway to the mental plane. Muna offered her sacred prayer bowing in acknowledgement and asked for her inner knowledge to be released.

“Open the gate of the East that I may share your energy, renew my spirit within your breath of Spring, clear the cobwebs of my thoughts so that I can see clearly from my heart”

She then turned to the South which represented summer, emotions and water, as she thought of the days at the lakeside with her friend, she acknowledged the South with a nod of her head in a reverent bow.

“Oh great South the land of the Sun, where no bird needs a map to guide them to the warmth, for you guide them back home. Guide me on my journey, help me see my own path, help me conquer my fears, let me lay them to rest. Help me see the journey before me and those who will help me fulfil my destiny.”

Next she turned to the West, the Fire of Autumn and blessed the spiritual realm for coming, asking for illumination.

“Great Fire of the West, allow your flame to blend with that of my candle, illuminate the darkness with your cleansing flame. Allow your flame to burst the seeds of knowledge, I ask that my ancestors come and bring their wisdom to help me upon this Quest” As Muna finished speaking the breeze picked up flickering her candle flame before the flame settled and grew even stronger in height.

The last stone she turned to was the North, The Earth stone representing winter the Physical Body and Wisdom. Sending once again her thoughts out she now sat down at the centre with her Dream-catcher, Sage, Locket, and Candle appearing like a little altar in front of her within her Medicine Wheel.

“I call upon the North, let your winds sweep away the mists that I fear so.. Let them cover the land bringing the flakes of cleansing snow to protect the land, so that the small creatures can feel the warm of its blanket. Let it bring the much-needed water to the lakes, and trees. I ask that you bring me the wisdom that will help me be stronger to face the storms in life help me trust my heart”

Sitting with legs now crossed, taking a deep breath, Muna closed her eyes and once again asked for a blessing around the circle. Breathing in deeply allowing herself to relax and go deeper within each breath. Muna breathed in she felt the energies spiralling from the middle of her circle, she felt her head spinning along with them.

The earth beneath her seemed to vibrate as the land of Day and Dreams merged in one as Muna was swept into her Vision Quest.

Image Source HERE

The Stories of Muna have been Scheduled I will be back to reply to your comments as soon as possible when I return from holiday. Many thanks for your patience

Love and Blessings Sue..

Vision Quest part 3

To continue the story of Muna, who was having recurring nightmares, her Grandmother Aponi had suggested she go off on a Vision Quest to confront her Demons. Aponi had taught Muna the Ancient ways of her tribe and so Muna had set off up into the mountains for her Vision Quest.

Parts One and Two can be found HERE

The story continues:

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The Ceremony Begins. 

Aponi had taught Muna well, saying the Medicine Wheel was a physical representation of the sacred circle that encompassed all life., that it had outer manifestation and inner force.  On a deeper level it represented the Universe and all matter that which was animate and inanimate. It represented Life, Death and rebirth,  she told Muna she must separate the circle into four segments, each segment represented the elements, Fire, Air, Water and Earth. And each were represented by the Four Directions of the compass.

So Muna set off in search of some stones she took well over an hour searching and feeling the energy of the stones and placed them in a large circle and divided the centre into four segments, next she opened up her bag and took out some of the things she had hurriedly packed at dawn.

She brought out a bundle of Sage, a lighter some tobacco, and a small white candle. Muna also had a locket which was her prized possession she unwrapped carefully from the coloured silk kerchief which she always kept it in.  Lovingly she places this within the circle. She took out a small jar which held some cornmeal and sprinkled some in the circle symbolising protection and abundance. Lastly was her Dream-catcher which she placed beside the medicine wheel.

Muna looked around at the flowers, wondering if she should pick some to place within the circle too.. But she knew the moment she picked them, their life would be extinguished, so Muna silently sent up a prayer offering instead the beauty of the mountain flowers all around her and offered the circle her tobacco which is sacred to the Great Spirit, saying “Grandfather sky and Grandmother Earth, protect my sacred circle with love, that I may find my answers”.

She now looked around her at the beauty of Mother earth as she looked high into the blue sky, and saw the glint of the sun on the lake far below.. The Vision Quest was about to start.

“Make this your ritual Muna, go with your own instincts I have told you how, but you follow your own guidance and thoughts, this is your ceremony” Aponi had said as Muna had packed her bag that morning. She now lit the sage bundle and blew on it until the embers glowed red, she took the sage bundle and moved it around her head and over her body, smudging herself and allowing the smoke to flow around and about her body. Muna felt the urge to hum, and started to sing one of the songs she often heard Aponi singing, She smiled to the sky and she offered her love to the Earth, and placed the cornmeal and the tobacco in the centre of the circle sprinkling more, still smudging herself and her circle. “Be sure to sing out loud and speak out so that the Spirit People can hear you” Aponi had said.. “ you need to wake them up, tell them how beautiful they are and wait and sense them Muna, you will sense their presence.”.

© Sue Dreamwalker  2010-2016 All rights reserved.

 

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