Dealing with Hurt.

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Dealing with Hurt

Many of us are hurting; dealing with pain is a fact that affects almost all of our lives to some degree. Since the hurt we feel may be a part of the experiences that have touched us most deeply, we are often loathed to let it go. It is sometimes  easier to keep our pain at our sides, where it acts as a shield that shelters us from others and gives us an identity—that of victim— from which we can draw bitter strength.

I was victim of feeling that my mother didn’t love me, She didn’t speak to me for 10 yrs,, And here I am still, 3 yrs after her passing, still holding onto that pain.. I realised on Monday when I went to have some acupuncture in the first course of treatment to try to help ease my own pains of living with Fibromyalgia.. FMS… I found myself in the consultation period telling the therapist about past illness and major events that I could recall in my life from childhood, And again and again the pain of my mother’s rejection hit home..

I work with individuals who have learning difficulties, and some of these people have led horrendous childhoods.. They too hold onto hurt, and perhaps can’t express that hurt as you or I.. And so they see and think differently from you or I.. Where you and I would express our thoughts with our words.. Some lash out with their fists, as that is all they were dealt when they were children.

However, pain’s universality can also empower us to use our hurt to help others heal. Since no pain is any greater or more profound than any other, what you feel can give you the ability to help bring about the recovery of individuals whose hurts are both similar to and vastly different from your own.. You can channel your pain into transformative and healing love that aids you in helping individuals on a one-to-one basis and spreading a tide of curative energy throughout the world… I try to do that with individuals I work with.. So you can then imagine my own hurt when I got assaulted by one of these individuals this week..  And once again I became a Victim..

But I needed to know that this experience also showed me something else, it gave me a sign.. It showed me that procedures within my workplace need to be re-evaluated,But it showed me once again how in a split second, Lives can be altered forever.. and it made me realise as I was comforting another service user who was upset by the attack on me, that there are many ways to use the hurt you feel to help others.

Your pain gives you a unique insight into the minds of people who have experienced trauma and heartache. You can draw from the wellspring of strength that allowed you to emerge on the other side of a painful experience and pass that strength to individuals still suffering from their wounds. You may be able to council individuals in need by showing them the coping methods that have helped you survive or simply by offering sympathy. A kinship can develop that allows you to relate more closely with those you are trying to aid and comfort.

Helping others can help your own heart grow stronger. In channelling your pain into compassionate service and watching others successfully recover, you may feel a sense of self-worth and optimism. To reach out to others can be the best way to declare to yourself and the world that your pain didn’t defeat you, and in fact it helped you heal. We are never given more than we can cope with, And with it comes our lessons upon our pathway.

The acupuncture was sharp, the assault hurt, but I realised that the pain I still carry is not be seen,  But it’s still  doing its damage.. FMS… Face My Self?.. I need to once again look in the mirror, and Let It GO…

Dreamwalker

 

 

 

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11 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. GOTHIC
    Jul 26, 2009 @ 07:07:18

    wow hun so true as always a briliant piece of writing,thankyou for leaving the poem on my page it was truely lovely of you,i tend to class myself more of a survivor these days i think im finally letting go thanks to good friends and step,have a wicked weekend hugs m xs

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  2. Sue
    Jul 26, 2009 @ 08:25:40

    Thinking of your Dreamwalker,and hoping the hurt and pain goes from you soonTake careSue

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  3. Sheila
    Jul 26, 2009 @ 16:36:39

    Thinking of you Dreamwalker some one said to me once when I was hurting and scolding myself. Don\’t beat yourself up Sheila don\’t be so hard on yourself. I know it\’s easier said than done but I hope you can one day soon xx Take care xx

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  4. Happy JAK
    Jul 26, 2009 @ 20:40:16

    Hiya Sue, Well the chat did wonders!!! Had a delightful day and hope you will have a wonderful day too!!! I\’m totally worn out. We ended up at a school carnival for the inbetween time for the services. JL and I had our faces painted. I can\’t ever remember havingmy face painted and to be honest it was so relaxing I could have fallen asleep in the chair. LOL! I will stop by this entry tomorrow as I don\’t want to just post a few words. I like to give thought to what your write. You have written such wise words of pain and hurt, that many of us do keep hidden deep within. And without knowing it still hugely impacts our live. Okay, I\’m getting sleepy now, it\’s just gone 12:38 AM Monday morning. Back up at 6:15 am, argh. Take Care beautiful, wise and most loving and caring person on the planet!!! Love to you. Nighty Night.

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  5. Babblelot
    Jul 27, 2009 @ 01:08:50

    Thinking of you. I find FMS is the scariest of all.Big HUGS!

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  6. Happy JAK
    Jul 28, 2009 @ 18:41:27

    Hi Lovely Friend!!! I haven\’t fogotten you. Hope you\’re feeling better today!!! I love the image here on this blog. So-oo true, Mental abuse doesn\’t leave marks but sure does leave lifelong scars. Forgiveness is the key… it doesn\’t mean that you let the person off the hook for their actions, it doesn\’t hurt any less. But by forgiving we give the problem to God and no longer have to carry the weight of the abuse. Something we have to keep on working with internally, as this is truly the hardest thing to fogive and forget.I did come online earlier today and was treated to seeing the most beautiful photo album ever! All of a Magnolia Tree. Soo-so magnificent! Then, before I knew it, had to do some stuff at home with a lot of screaming and yelling. This afternoon till roughly an hour ago Jaiden and I have done six hours of homework. The worst thing is we still have one work sheet to complete, before Friday, plus the regular four books per night of reading, learning sight words and now learning to spell a new list of words each week. As you know, he stayed home Monday, but we still do the work at home on days off. The teacher has the homework uploaded so we go online and we can print out the work for the week, plus do his online maths homework. This is week three, term three and I think the homework load is three times bigger!!! So, I am exhausted and need about three hours to unwind but can\’t afford to stay up to 1:30 AM, but no doubt I will. I\’ve also missed viewing the Bible Shows that I especially get up to watch at 2:30 AM for about two, three weeks now. Now I\’m going to go around spaces for a LITTLE while if I can manage it. Then, I plan to spend some time, either listening to some soothing music, music of the Lord\’s, or doing some Bible reading. I think the soothing music to unwind…. Tomorrow is the NED show at school (that I blogged about), but right now I\’m too-oo tired to even think about if I will make it or not. I will need to walk an hour to get there and an hour home. So it may be too much for me with everything else. Ohh, I\’m exhausted thinking about it. So not laughing. Okay, my lovely friend well it\’s over and out for now. Love you. xoxo Super BIG Hugs!!!

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  7. Happy JAK
    Jul 28, 2009 @ 19:04:51

    ALL ABUSE IS HAVING YOUR HEART PRICKED WITH PINS AND NEEDLES AND SLOWING BLEEDING… http://i41.tinypic.com/30ixkoy.jpg"

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  8. Happy JAK
    Jul 28, 2009 @ 21:34:32

    Argh, I\’m sure you can guess… it\’s 1:34 AM. So-oo tired… hope I don\’t sleep in tomorrow. That will NOT BE GOOD.

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  9. Teira
    Aug 02, 2009 @ 06:54:59

    "Since no pain is any greater or more profound than any other, what you feel can give you the ability to help bring about the recovery of individuals whose hurts are both similar to and vastly different from your own.. You can channel your pain into transformative and healing love that aids you in helping individuals on a one-to-one basis and spreading a tide of curative energy throughout the world."A beautiful way of expressing this truth….We need more teachings like this on how to chanel hurt and pain into a positive…..For those who succeed in transforming the pain and hurt great miricals can be achieved….Wishing you a blessed sunday…….x

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  10. T
    Aug 04, 2009 @ 17:22:03

    We are given as much as we can cope with …. that is so true. But we are still afraid because we don\’t know what a huge power we have inside. Hug,T

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  11. LiL'Kt
    Aug 24, 2009 @ 18:53:30

    Very good blog Dreamwalker, it does leave it\’s scar\’s deeply but i to, like you, now channel that into helping other\’s of all ages and all background\’s …. xx

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