Dealing with Hurt
Many of us are hurting; dealing with pain is a fact that affects almost all of our lives to some degree. Since the hurt we feel may be a part of the experiences that have touched us most deeply, we are often loathed to let it go. It is sometimes easier to keep our pain at our sides, where it acts as a shield that shelters us from others and gives us an identity—that of victim— from which we can draw bitter strength.
I was victim of feeling that my mother didn’t love me, She didn’t speak to me for 10 yrs,, And here I am still, 3 yrs after her passing, still holding onto that pain.. I realised on Monday when I went to have some acupuncture in the first course of treatment to try to help ease my own pains of living with Fibromyalgia.. FMS… I found myself in the consultation period telling the therapist about past illness and major events that I could recall in my life from childhood, And again and again the pain of my mother’s rejection hit home..
I work with individuals who have learning difficulties, and some of these people have led horrendous childhoods.. They too hold onto hurt, and perhaps can’t express that hurt as you or I.. And so they see and think differently from you or I.. Where you and I would express our thoughts with our words.. Some lash out with their fists, as that is all they were dealt when they were children.
However, pain’s universality can also empower us to use our hurt to help others heal. Since no pain is any greater or more profound than any other, what you feel can give you the ability to help bring about the recovery of individuals whose hurts are both similar to and vastly different from your own.. You can channel your pain into transformative and healing love that aids you in helping individuals on a one-to-one basis and spreading a tide of curative energy throughout the world… I try to do that with individuals I work with.. So you can then imagine my own hurt when I got assaulted by one of these individuals this week.. And once again I became a Victim..
But I needed to know that this experience also showed me something else, it gave me a sign.. It showed me that procedures within my workplace need to be re-evaluated,But it showed me once again how in a split second, Lives can be altered forever.. and it made me realise as I was comforting another service user who was upset by the attack on me, that there are many ways to use the hurt you feel to help others.
Your pain gives you a unique insight into the minds of people who have experienced trauma and heartache. You can draw from the wellspring of strength that allowed you to emerge on the other side of a painful experience and pass that strength to individuals still suffering from their wounds. You may be able to council individuals in need by showing them the coping methods that have helped you survive or simply by offering sympathy. A kinship can develop that allows you to relate more closely with those you are trying to aid and comfort.
Helping others can help your own heart grow stronger. In channelling your pain into compassionate service and watching others successfully recover, you may feel a sense of self-worth and optimism. To reach out to others can be the best way to declare to yourself and the world that your pain didn’t defeat you, and in fact it helped you heal. We are never given more than we can cope with, And with it comes our lessons upon our pathway.
The acupuncture was sharp, the assault hurt, but I realised that the pain I still carry is not be seen, But it’s still doing its damage.. FMS… Face My Self?.. I need to once again look in the mirror, and Let It GO…