Where does one’s thoughts start as you try to make sense of the world?.. You can’t. All you can try to do is make sense of your own. And even that at times is hard to fathom.
I search my heart and often the tears will flow for no reason, other than such sadness sweeps through me at what we are doing to ourselves.
I pull myself up and give myself a good talking to.. Oh often!.. If you were a fly on the wall will you hear me talking away to myself. I am so blessed, very much so with the love of family, and try to send out my positive vibes to help add some Healing and peace to the world..
Is it the world’s tears I feel, or am I still shedding the layers of my own emotions? As I peel them off one by one.. Like the onion each layer releases its own toxins as my eyes sting from the injustices, the abuse, the suffering of many, the hurts of wounds unseen, I seem to take all to heart.. I cry inwardly within my moments of empathy for all whom I hear crying along with me.. Sometimes I wish I were not so sensitive, but I cannot and do not wish to change that what I am. ME.
And yet I also know all too well, that adding my tears solves nothing. It is only adding to the mixture of sorrow.. And I only want to add love and Peace to help bring about our own Humanities healing…
So I try to detach.. and often I am successful, I busy myself doing the things I love doing, painting, writing poetry, reading, Meditation, Qi Gong, gardening, playing with my granddaughter..
This month has been perhaps one of the hardest months ever for me. Perhaps it’s because I made the decision to retire.. We humans like to think we are in control don’t we?, The emotions I feel I cannot describe, as so many churn within my being. This decision took a Big trust in the Universe to go along with what I know felt right.. And I trust in its plan… and am ready to go along with the flow..And this step is a big one for me to take, and now it’s taken, I take the leap of faith to change.
We all Fear Change, mainly because we are treading upon uncharted waters.. We doubt and we want security… Trusting in something unseen and not tried is for many what holds them from making changes.. as they hang onto what they know… Much like the world right now, as we hang onto the old systems, the old ways, while all the while many are craving to break free of their constraints, as many are tied into the systems that hold them in debt that keeps them enslaved into the treadmill of toil… Life was never meant to be like this… Take a look around you.. Are you free?
I know I have my guides guarding my back, nudging me along, I just need to have more faith in me, so as if to let me know I am on the right path Synchronicities have already been showing up, I hope to explain about those at a later date.
I am writing from my heart as Its time to take a short break. I want this week to paint more.. and to just reflect and meditate as I allow my own inner healing to connect..
I thank you all for your kind and loving support.. and will be back to visit with my loyal friends shortly. Much love..
Love and Blessings